Focus On What You Want; Not What You Don't Want

You may not always get what you want in life but you almost always get what you expect.
I see this principle played out over and over again in my own life the lives of my clients. We want something different but can't get past the fear of what we think is really going to happen. When we are thinking about what we don't want we are so much more likely to experience it in life. And the more emotion there is behind the thing we don't want the more likely it is to manifest.

This principle is explained in "The Sedona Method" like this:

" Here's how this works. Perhaps we have an experience that we don't like (the boss yells at us), or something happens to a person we care about (a friend gets sick or has a car accident), or maybe we don't like the news we hear that day( the stock market takes a nose dive). Therefore, we want to change it. Either we think, "I hope this doesn't happen to me," or, "I hope this never happens again," which is where we get stuck. Since the mind sees and creates in pictures, it does not accurately translate negations- words like not, never, or don't. As a result, it interprets our hopes in reverse and sustains them.
If you don't believe me, try and right now to not picture a shoe. What happened? If you are like most people, you immediately saw a shoe in your mind's eye. The harder we try to not create what we do not want, the stronger we are holding on to the idea; thus, the more likely we are to create it in our reality. "

So make a choice right now to release the emotions you have feeding the negative beliefs and fears in your life and start to think more about what you really want with emotion. Maybe you could pick something small to start with and practice. Don't be scared to find out how powerful you can be in creating your own life.. you are already doing it now..your just learning how to do it on purpose!

Starting Your Day Out Right

As we try and focus on the positive in our lives it is helpful to start our morning out with some questions of awareness.

1. What am I happy about in my life right now?
2. What am I excited about in my life right now?
3. What am I proud of in my life right now?
4. What am I grateful about in my life right now?
5. What am committed to in my life right now?
6. What can I do today to improve my life?
7. How can I help another person today?

As we ponder on these questions while starting our day it helps to keep us in response and action instead of reaction to situations and people during our day. We keep focused about what we want to feed and improve in our lives so we choose according to those values and goals.

What state are you in right now?

I have been reading a book about the Sedona Method. The Sedona method has been used for over 30yrs to help people break negative emotional patterns in their lives. By using the method you learn to both identify and release emotional states that are not serving you. In fact it really is not about judging the emotions as good or bad but whether they are serving you or not. Are you emotions improving your life or hindering your progress?


In the book 9 emotional states are identified:

1. Apathy: Apathy is a state where we are unaware of our emotions or feelings. We have little if no energy to accept our situation and no hope of change in it.
2. Grief: In grief we want help but cannot see how we can get out of the situation or feelings on our own. We have a little more energy to address the issue but still very limited.
3. Fear: With fear we have more energy but our energy is not productive. We desire to "strike out" at those around us and our situation. However we not thinking very clearly so our efforts are not very effective in helping us. At times we can be paralyzed and take not actions yet still experience deep emotions.
4. Lust: When experiencing lust we want, want, want. We are focused almost completely inside our selves and are deeply aware of what we want and do not have. In lust you never feel satisfied. The grass is always greener on the other side.
5. Anger: In Anger our feelings and thoughts are about getting even and hurting those around us and sometimes ourselves. We have more action energy in anger but still not very productive in bringing happiness into our lives.
6. Pride: Pride leaves us with the need to be right. We are resistant to change or feedback and our energy is spent keeping our appearances up for ourselves and others. There very little energy to accept more effective ways of getting our needs met.
7: Courageousness: In Courageousness we feel good about ourselves and have started to believe we can accomplish our goals and desires. We are able to look at others and ourselves honestly and still feel good about life. We have a lot more energy and are able to channel it into constructive action.
8. Acceptance: When we experience acceptance we are truly are okay with everything the way it is in the moment. We let go of the need for change and live in the moment.
9. Peace: In peace life just is. Your energy is quite and calm. You are able to just truly be without any judgement or needs.. just being with yourself is the key to peace.

The Sedona Method teaches us how to identify and release the non-serving emotional states.

We ask ourselves 4 questions:
1. Could you allow yourself to welcome this feeling as best you can?
2. Could you allow yourself to let it go?
3. Would you let it go?
4. When?

Of course this is a simple over view of the method but I wanted to share as I feel it has enhanced my understanding of my own emotional states and combined with the other techniques I use can be a great help to me and my clients.
The book is called "The Sedona Method" and is written by Hale Dwoskin
I recommend you check it!