If someone you dearly loved gave you a size 5 shoe for a gift would you wear it even though you wore a size 8?What a silly question right? Of course you would not squeeze your size 8 foot into a size 5 and wear that shoe around causing you great pain and discomfort. That would make no sense at all. You would likely just thank the person for their gift and inform them that you wore size 8 not 5. However what if they had the belief that every one wore size 5 and it was the right size to wear? How would you respond to that belief?
This is a funny thought. I was working with a client this morning in which this analogy came to me in relation to taking on family beliefs. Sometimes we take on and continue old family beliefs that are harming and hurting us just cause they were "given" to us from those we love and trust. Just like squeezing a size 8 foot into a size 5 shoe would cause us great pain and if done over and over again eventually would disform our foot, so do our old beliefs cause us pain and distort our beliefs and behaviours in life. It is healthy to review the beliefs our family has passed down and see if they are helping us in our lives and if they have any basis in reality or if they have become only self fulfilling prophecies in our family. One belief that comes up in families often is not to surpass you parents success. You need to keep your level of success close to your parents as to not show them up. This is one of those size 5 shoes that will keep your foot from growing as it is meant to be. It is self serving on the parents part to protect their ego and beliefs about themselves. They need to keep others down in order to make themselves feel better. They likely don't do it on purpose but will criticize or sabotage family members who look like they are about to surpass them in success. Their belief benefits them and no one else. If you find this pattern and belief in your family you can just acknowledge that it is on old size 5 shoe that does not fit your size 8 foot and discard it. If the family reacts to you challenging the belief you will know that it is just them not understanding that you have a size 8 foot. There is nothing wrong with what you are doing and eventually they will accept the change and allow the belief to be different. In fact possibly they will learn to be proud of your success and you will have shifted the belief for all family members to create success in the future.
There is an old saying:
" The best thing you can do for the poor is not be one of them"
I cannot remember the author I am sorry. But it is, I believe a true statement. Show them the way through your shedding of the old way of thinking and behaving and creating a successful present and future!
EFT and Rapid Eye are great techniques to help you shed and discard old family beliefs and traditions that are no longer helping but hurting you.
You can check out EFT at: http://www.emofree.com
Happy Fall Everyone!
